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The last couple of weeks have been a whirlwind of travel for me (Eric).  I spent nine days traveling to Michigan to do a variety of things: doing work for FamilyLife, meeting with great long-time friends over some pie ala mode, attending a wonderful church Missions Conference.  That trip also included two meetings that were canceled last minute because of deaths in the family.

I’ve had meetings cancel occasionally, but never have I experienced something like this – two deaths.  One was the daughter of the couple I was to meet – totally unexpected – she was in her 20s.  The second, was the mother of my meeting host – she was in her 80s and here health had been failing over the last several weeks.  What a contrast huh?  Yet, what similarities.

These were important meetings and now my plans were messed up.  Yes, I had those brief thoughts.  No, they didn’t last long.  First, I needed to ‘re-focus’ my attention – my plans, really?  Once I took my focus off of myself – second, I was able to reach out and minister to these friends with just a few words of scripture and condolences.  During the trip, I continued to contemplate what purpose God had in store through these events.

“It often seems that one of the measures of a mature Christian regarding death is how much we rejoice and how little we cry … The longer we grieve, the weaker we appear. But biblical Christianity makes a distinction between ‘grieving’ and ‘grieving without hope.’ (1 Thessalonians 4:13). Grief over loss is something natural and normal. It is something we ought to do.” – Rick Taylor, When Life Is Changed Forever.

Less than two days after returning from my Michigan trip, I got a morning phone call form my Mom asking if I had heard the news.  What news?  The 76 year old father of one of my close friends had passed away early that morning.  YES, I was confronted with another death.   Seriously?  Seriously!  I had a tough time sleeping that night.

Deb and I made the decision that if I could, I would go to the services in Pennsylvania.  God brought it together in some amazing ways – including allowing me to find a very reasonable ticket at such a late time.  I went to PA, spent some time with my family and friends.  I told my close friend, “It’s what I could do.”

Folks, death is real!  Death is around us.  I like what Paul David Tripp says,

“Every time someone dies, it reminds us that death still lives. But every death also points us to the promise that Christ brings a resurrection once and forever. Through Christ, death has been defeated … Yes, death is an enemy, but this enemy will die. Christ’s present reign guarantees this.” – Paul Tripp, Finding Hope Again.

I mentioned earlier similarities in these deaths.  All of these families have something in common (besides knowing me).  They are now the ones left behind on this earth to deal with their grief and loss.  What will that look like for them?  I don’t really know – the journey of grief is different for everyone.

Are you dealing with grief?  Perhaps these brief steps and resources might help you:

• Memorize scriptures of hope: Psalm 147:3, Isaiah 53:3-5, John 14:27 are a few.
• Honestly pour your heart out to God in prayer.
• If you are angry with God – tell Him that.  God’s big enough to handle it!  Read through some of David’s Psalms to see how he did it.
• List the things you can thank God for as it relates to the person you lost.
• Read the book, “A Grace Disguised: How the Soul Grows Through Loss”, by Jerry Sittser.  This is one of my favorite books on working through grief.

O, by the way, I still may not ‘know’ God’s purposes, but I do know and have the assurance of this: